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Archive for the Counseling Category

Time for a Couple Checkup?

You get your oil changed every 3,000 miles . . . you get your teeth cleaned at least once a year . . . you even get regular physical exams . . . Your marriage deserves a checkup too! It is important to do a checkup of your marital or dating relationship to keep up with your relational demands. One of the areas of my coaching and counseling business has been focused on helping couples achieve an intentional relationship. A couple checkup is one of the most effective and intentional tools that I have found to take an insightful look at the key areas of your relationship including communication, conflict resolution, financial management, spiritual beliefs and more. How does the Couple Checkup work? Contact me


Thought and Character

As the plant springs from, and could not be without, the seed, so every act of man springs from the hidden seeds of thought, and could not have appeared without them. This applies equally to those acts called “spontaneous” and “unpremeditated” as to those which are deliberately executed.


Creative Communication (Part 2)

Empowerment Language is used to self-empower rather than self-sabotage. Making statements based on TRUTH (self-empowerment) rather than LIES (self-sabotage) opens the creative process. When we use Empowerment Language it creates a solution model rather than a permission model. Permission Model *    Muted tone of voice and distant *    Closed and ashamed body language *     Soft and sporadic eye contact *    Doubtful and weak attitude When a person is working from the Permission Model, they are working from the victim role. They are looking through the typical glasses or lenses that haven’t been challenged. The Permission Model creates a set of behaviors that are not working for the individual. It is like running into walls time after time, all day long. In the Victim Role, a


Creative Communication – (Part 1)

Last night a gave a presentation to a group of Focus Seminar graduates entitled “Creative Communication”. It seems that every time I talk about communication I have some more insight of how to grow through effective communication so I wanted to share some of it with whomever takes the time to read this blog. Based on a study of communication at the University of Pennsylvania in 1970 (Kinesics and Communication, R. Birdwhistle), the researchers determined that in communication, 7% of what we communicate is the result of the words that we say, or the content of our communication. 38% of our communication to others is a result of our verbal behavior, which includes tone of voice, timbre, tempo, and volume. 55% of our communication to


Moral Tolerance

There is an invisible line in our lives that determines which side of morality we fall on. When it comes to morality, there is a right and there is a wrong. There is a moral law we have distorted in order to make it more comfortable for our everyday lives. It’s my belief that this tolerance creates confusion to all. Young children cannot understand the moral tolerance that some of us lead with. Young children will follow what the adults around them display, not necessarily what they say…and there in lies the tolerance. What would it be like if our actions matched up with the moral convictions that were rooted in truth? When we have rules without clear understanding it creates rebellion in a young



I have witnessed first hand a clear picture of the decline in morality that is around us everyday. It’s my guess that a good percentage of folks do not even examine their morals before taking action on decisions in their lives. Just recently I have experienced teenagers and twenty-somethings being positively reinforced for the lack of examining their morals before making life-altering decisions. Unfortunately, many of those teenagers and twenty-somethings are being taught their immorality by watching the adults in their lives. What are we pretending not to know? Somehow I believe that people truly believe that they are going to escape the consequences of immorality. That they are bullet-proof to the gun of life! We believe we are entitled to happiness and peace yet


Happiness vs. Joy

Happiness is temporary, but joy is eternal. Happiness depends upon outward experiences, but joy comes from within. This quote from Adrian Rogers hit me over the weekend and I have been processing as I start this week. No one can take our joy from us…we can only give it away. There are many things that influence my happiness on a daily basis but how often do we consider the joy that is still present within us. The word happy means “lucky,” and comes from the word hap which means “chance, fortune;” sense of “very glad”. In World War II the word happy was actually used to define a state of being “dazed or frazzled from stress.” I don’t know about you but I don’t want


Take The 5 Love Languages Profile

I have used the 5 Love Languages book for quite a while and most of you have probably read it (if not go get it). It’s always good to have a reminder…take the profile below:


Top Life Coach in Kansas City area.

I’m honored to have an article written about me on Check it out here: Top Life Coach in Kansas City area. I encourage you to check our some of the other articles on the site and thanks for following my blog.


Rear View Mirror

The rear view mirror of our life holds many things. Looking into the rear view mirror of life can be motivating and awakening if there have been intentional steps taken on our journey! As I approach a milestone birthday in life I believe now is as good as any time to look into the rear view of life at the intentional steps that have positioned me right here, right now! From the time I was 10 years old I was searching for something significant in my life. I searched many places high and low and got hung up in many behaviors that were potentially destructive. I thought that I had found significance a few times along the way, only to find out that it was

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